


Down Under Death Dealers

by periwren



Category: Sander Sides, Sander sides web series, Thomas Sanders, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: All Australian Wildlife will kill you, Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Thomas Sanders, Australia, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders/Thomas Sanders, Creepy Crawley Death Dealers, Logic | Logan Sanders/Thomas Sanders, Morality | Patton Sanders/Thomas Sanders, Spiders, literally everything
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-29
Updated: 2017-10-29
Packaged: 2019-01-26 01:34:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,286
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12545860
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/periwren/pseuds/periwren
Summary: Thomas is excited about going to Australia for the first time for a YouTuber at a convention. All the sides are excited about going too. Except then Patton goes and does a little research. And finds some compelling reasons why Thomas should not go at all.





	Down Under Death Dealers

Everyone lost it. Like completely lost it. For good reason of course. 

Thomas Sanders had just announced to his sides that YouTube had invited him to be a special guest at a convention for creators of online content. In Australia. All expenses - flights, accommodation, food etc. paid in full. All he had to do was do a few meet and greets with fans, a few talks on some panels about his channel. Simple. And the rest of the time he could go sight seeing - again completely paid for - because the sponsors understood some of the best content was made spur of the moment and anything he filmed would be promoting the area, and some of the sponsors were actually tourism companies. (The best example of this was Rooster Teeth's: RT life Two Guys save A Penguin - people had flocked to the area after that went online).

The sides were thrilled for Thomas and so excited, they were going to go with him to Australia. Roman was going to get to meet in person an entirely new set of fans that had never seen him in the flesh before - ah he could just hear their fan girl screams now.

Logic was interested in experiencing a new culture, new architecture (the Sydney Opera house looked fascinating) and new things to learn - the night sky, what would constellations look like in the Southern Hemisphere? 

Even Virgil who was nervous about the having to be on a plane for ages was looking forward to it. Australia was the home of the platypus - that thing was just so weird but cute at the same time. 

But Morality was the most excited of them all.  

Morality was excited about everything. Absolutely everything. Meeting new people, seeing new places, trying new foods, new driving rules- everything. When Thomas had announced it he had screamed so loud that he caused himself to chock again. 

When they had all (somewhat) calmed down and synced out of the living room, Morality immediately started packing - even though the trip wasn't for several weeks.  

He pulled his suitcase from out of his closet and threw it open to and was about to dump a bunch of his clothes in it when he saw _**IT.**_

A (small) spider in the corner of his suitcase. He screamed. And then screamed louder. The others came running. They found Morality standing on his bed, eyes wide with terror, pointing at the case on the floor. Logic and Virgil did their best not to roll their eyes, they knew their friend was scared of spiders but really the thing was tiny. Princey picked up the case and took it outside to release the spider unharmed into the wild as the other two coaxed Patton down off his bed and comforted him gently. After Princey showed Morality that the case was empty (Patton wouldn't let him bring the case back into his room until he could see that it was safe), the others gave him one more pat on the back and left him to his business. 

After they were gone Patton took some deep breaths to calm himself. Look on the bright side, he thought to himself, at least you saw it before you dumped all your clothes in there. He suppressed a shudder at the thought of spiders in his clothes. Suddenly his cat hoodie made his skin crawl, he took it off and shook it to make sure there were no creepy crawly death dealers hiding in front pocket. 

He gulped. He was being silly - there were no more spiders in his room. 

Then he had a thought - Did Australia have spiders? Or other scary animals. He should probably check.

Just to make sure Thomas would be safe on this trip. Maybe there would be something that Virgil didn't know about and he could tell him to help protect Thomas (and him). Because Virgil wasn't scared of spiders so if there were some in Australia he could take care of them. Or Princey. Or Logan. Anybody else really. 

So Morality opened up his laptop. He typed Australian wildlife w. He meant to type "s" for spiders but accidently hit the "w" instead. A sense of dread filled his stomach as google auto finished it to: Australian wildlife will kill you. That was concerning, he would look at that in a bit but first he wanted to just see about Australian spiders. 

Australian Spiders search. Oh.  _Oh. **OH MY GOODNESS.**_

~~~~

Patton was back in the living room. Pale and shaking. He called everyone back urgently. 

Thomas was surprised as to being called - that normally didn't happen. He looked at Patton with concern along with the other sides, he was clearly upset and wasn't even trying to hide it by being silly and laughing. This was very serious. 

"Patton are you okay? What is it? Why did you summon us here?" asked Logan. 

"Oh I'll be alright don't you worry but I just had to tell you that Thomas you are not going to Australia." stated Patton in a matter of fact fashion.  

It took everyone a few moments to process what Morality had just said. 

"I -wha- huh?" spluttered Thomas. 

"What?! Why?" cried Princey who had already been daydreaming of all the wonderful performances he would do down under. He had even tried practising the authentic language and had nearly mastered "G'day." (He hadn't, it sounded terrible).

"Because of spiders." said Patton. 

"Sorry to tell you this Dad, but spiders live everywhere. You might recall the one that was living in your suit-" said Anxiety but stopped abruptly after a stern glare from Logic, the last thing they needed was Patton remembering the spider in the suitcase despite the fact it happened only 20 minutes ago. 

"Yes but Australia has "Australian" spiders." said Patton. 

"Um yes Patton Australia will probably have different animals but you shouldn't focus on something like spiders. Think of all the cute adorable creatures that are only in Australia like kangaroos or koala bears-" said Thomas

"Actually the correct term is just koala. Not koala bear. Koalas are not bears." put in Logic. 

"What? But they look just like them and-" argued Princey. 

" _Not bears."_ argued back Logic. 

Morality turned and gave Thomas a piercing "Dad" glare, putting both hands on his hips, "Listen short stuff-

"We're the same height"

"- you are never ever going to Australia - I will not lose my darling baby boy to those horrible creepy crawly death dealers understand!"

Thomas looked at his fatherly trait exasperated. 

"Patton look, this isn't a big deal-"

Morality pulled out his laptop and flipped open the screen. 

"This is a bird eating spider. Let me repeat that: BIRD EATING spider. It is a spider that EATS BIRDS!"

"Yuck." explained Princey. 

Morality wasn't finished. 

"This is a video of a snake getting caught by a spider-"

"I don't think that is a frequent occurrence though." muttered Logic although the did look a bit worried that the much larger snake could not escape the spiders web. 

"And let us take a quick look at these images shall we - apparently ones of this size getting into the house is normal." said Morality scrolling through the images. 

"That one's just a picture of a wall clock." said Thomas. 

"That's what I though too." said Morality darkly. 

"Oh. OH MAN THAT'S NOT RIGHT." exclaimed Virgil the first one to see it. 

"What?"

"6 to 9. Look at 6 to 9." said Virgil pointing at the screen.

Suddenly Roman saw it and screamed.  

"Suggested course of action is to use a vacuum cleaner or sell your house." said Morality. 

~~~~~

Thomas thought there might be safer places to visit first in his career - perhaps Europe. 


End file.
